LE Reflection Blog

       Today was the day we were graded on our document and site. Some of the problems I had was the amount of pronouns used in my paragraphs. In most of my paragraph there were multiple times when I used we, I , and us and that was the main thing that put my grades lower. Another thing I would like to improve is the bio under our picture. The advice that Mr. Paterson gave us was to talk about the qualifications that we have to make us valid to give this statements. One thing that is in my current bio is that I have lived in America for most of my life. But this was not enough as just living there was not enough to say that I can say anything. That is why in the revised version I would like to add the fact that I have been to over 10 different school over my life and so I know the small improvements that school make to make the life easier for the students. The last thing I was told to improve or change was the use of some words in the paragraph. For example I used t...

Today was the last day to finish the brochure and essay. One thing we had to rush on was the website because we were so caught up in the essay that we were not able to get our hands on the website. The AWL and RL were also really hard because we had to force our paragraph into sounding hard and high level but I thought that took away the creativity we had in our writing. For example, one of my group members wanted to make a high leveled sentence so they used the word developed in the sentence multiple. Times. Consequently, because the word developed was hackneyed even though it was higher in level it was forced and was not a sentence that was enjoyable.

The main focus of this day was to finish the conclusion. The first conclusion we wrote was only about 5 sentences long and we noticed that it had nothing that the teacher said we had to have in it. So we took few days to fix the structure of the paragraph. Like it was said in class, we started with a summary of the ideas we had and choose our best ones to summarize. Doing this made the paragraph really long so it was hard to keep it in the sentence limits. One thing I didn't understand to well was the difference between the summary and conclusion. 

On this day we continued writing our essay. The focus of the day was to finish our body paragraph. Some things we tried to fix were the use of pronouns. In our paragraphs we had a lot of pronouns including we, i, and you and so we tried to eliminate those as much as possible. The process we took to get rid of all the pronouns was to find them and replace them with better words that don't have pronouns in them. One thing that was hard was trying to find words to replace them and when I was able to replace it it was hard to find new words and not the words we already used for the other replacements. 

Today in class we edited our writing to make sure the the reasons to our claim were in the topic sentence of our paragraph. When I checked my paragraph I noticed that I started with the data we took and not a topic sentence. This would not be good because it wouldn't tell the reader what they are going to be reading about. So to change that I wrote the general idea at the beginning of the paragraph.

Today we mostly tweaked the slides after we got evaluated. We were't able to get a lot done but one thing I would've improved the white line that showed up when the inserted the pictures.

On this day, we started our evaluation with the group. Personally, I think that there are many things that I would say that I need improvement on. One of the several things was, the time of speech. During the presentation it ended up with me only talking for a minute even though during the practice, I've expected to talk for 2-3 minutes. One way that I can improve this is by getting more content to talk about. I only had the placement of tables to talk about during our presentation, but I think I should've talked about some other idea too. Another thing I would of liked to improve is the eye contact and movement. This was mostly during the video portion of the presentation when I was mostly looking at the screen and not talking to the audience. the best way to improve this in my opinion was to practice more. By practicing to talk over the video I would be able to look at the audience more and be less nervous while presentation.